I would say my racial identity is white. I became aware of my racial identity early in my life. I believe it was through learning about history in elementary school. I don’t have clear memories of it but I remember seeing that some people had different color skin than me and it never really occurred to me that it meant something other than just having different skin tones. Throughout life and as I grew up I remember seeing how people in my high school and middle school grouped together with people of their race. I also became aware of the different language, lifestyle, and experiences that people of different races had. So I guess me fully becoming aware of what race was, was a longer process than just one day someone telling me everything about race.
As I learned more about race, racism, etc. I began to have mixed feelings about my racial identity. I’m disgusted at what people of my race have done in the past and still continue to do. I hate being associated with them in identity. Its complicated and I think a lot of people may have complicated feelings about their racial identity because of all the mixed messages in society. For example, whites people implication that they are superior race when other races point out whites as oppressors. Not everyone of a specific race will have the same opinion, but I believe generally those are the feelings. However, feeling guilty has never done anything for everyone. Feel it and move on.
I would like to be more involved in helping America move more towards equality and equity. I benefit a lot from my racial identity. In ways I do not even know. Simple things even. Just walking into a grocery store and seeing food geared toward my race. A Band-Aid matching my skin tone. When a white person walks by they will not question if I am a threat due to my race. I won’t be questioned or pulled over by the police because of my race. I do not have to be frightened for my life when a police pulls me over. There are many more white privileges. Seeing my race in media. Movies, magazines, ads, tv shows, toys, etc. I’ll never understand what it’s like to be a different race. Not even a little bit. Which does this prevent any type of relation between people of different races? I do wonder. It is probably why their aren’t many interracial relationships. Why people of the same race tend to form groups. Because they have shared experiences. I’m not exactly disadvantaged by my race. I only really gain privileges out of it.
